We have greatly expanded the “right turn on red when clear” rule in South Florida. Among your other choices: “right turn on red when not clear,” “left turn on red when clear,” “right turn from the left lane when you think you can make it,” “left turn on red when you think you got robbed by the light,” and the ever-popular “blow through the red light at high speed while talking on the mobile phone.”
Why is my tongue cleaving to the roof of my mouth? Is something apocalyptic going down? Oh, wait. False alarm. Sleeping with the furnace on.
Why is there a freaking mosquito in my house? Biko! Close the patio door!
Be careful of what you wish. We’ve been needing rain pretty badly since the dry season started. With the storm front that has stalled over our area for the last week, I bet we’ve received at least five inches of rain. Our annual average for the entire month of December is about two.
While watching Jon Bon Jovi’s performance last night on Saturday Night Live: “What’s wrong with his toupée?” I ask. “It’s from the wrong decade,” responded a sleepy Midge.
There’s only one thing I like about Halloween and Wal-Mart: candy corn flavor saltwater taffy.
Wonder of wonders. Cooler weather arrives in South Florida. This is the first time we’ve had the AC off and the windows open in six months.
My ‘94 Toyota pickup just hit 75,000 miles yesterday. That works out to an average of 5000 miles per year. Tidy.
Instant karma, South Florida style: As I pull into the grocery store parking lot, an old lady in one car doesn’t like the speed that another old lady is vacating her parking space, so she lays on the horn. And it sticks. I was in the store for ten minutes and when I came out, a security vehicle had pulled up and the guy was under the hood, pulling the wire from the horn. So much for haste.
One of the signs of seasonal change is upon us: the vultures, both turkey and black, have returned to the area. They are much more numerous here in the “winter.” Soon, one of my favorite birds, the shrike, will be making its appearance. Occasionally, there is a one little shrike standing on the roof of each home in the neighborhood.